I don’t receive text messages very often and I’m okay with that. But on the occasions that I do receive one, I jump up in the air and click my heels, for it’s been confirmed: someone was thinking of me.
Let me share one I got today:
“[Name withheld] smells and it permeates my couch. I’ve known [...]

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I saw Billy Bob Thornton in the hallway today. He was wearing a sleeveless shirt, exposing two arms filled with tasteless tattoos. His sideburns nearly met at his chin. And he was eating a plateful of pancakes.
I almost judged him for his tasteless style until I remembered that Angelina Jolie used to kiss him.

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I realized this morning that I wear a lot of flannel buttoned shirts. When I’m turned into an action figure, make sure I’m wearing something striped and tasteful. It seems to be my natural state. Other recommendations for my action figure:

sweats at inconvenient times!
now with more self-loathing!
comes with free delusions of grandeur!
new push-button sarcasm!

Doug posed [...]

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“He illuminated the maze brilliantly, even if he couldn’t show us the way out.”
-A.O. Scott
“You didn’t need to read his sentences twice. They were brilliant and also colloquial. How he pulled that off is a literary voodoo I might never understand. To say he will be missed is an understatement for the ages.”
-Josh Dean
“If I [...]

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David is recording an album even though he shouldn’t be.
NYU has an audio booth for its film majors. It’s usually a vehicle for recording sound effects and voiceovers, but today it was serving a higher purpose - music, and lots of it.
I deftly ferried my banjo from Harlem to the outskirts of Greenwich Village, and [...]

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