There’s a juice bar across the street from my house. Every day I walk by and think about all the evil, filthy food I put in my body throughout the week and how maybe a visit to the juice bar might curb some of it. Today I finally paid the place a visit.

It redefined “organic” and “homegrown.” I browsed the construction paper menus taped to the wall. Every drink was named after the ailment that it cured. After going back and forth between “diabetes” and “bruises,” I settled on “stress.” The guy used a machete right in front of me to cut open some coconuts. He threw a huge mix of powders and oils into a dusty old blender and watched it mix for a minute. He poured the concoction into a Dunkin’ Donuts cup. I thanked him and left.

After the first taste, I can honestly say it’s probably the healthiest thing I’ve ever ingested. I know this because it tasted absolutely terrible.

The subways were down for maintenance in my neighborhood, so to get to Midtown I took the bus. Anyone wanting to do some groundbreaking sociological research need only pack 50 people onto a New York City bus and watch the results unfold. The woman next to me read a pornographic book. The guy across the aisle poured some vodka into his grape juice. Someone started shouting four letter words at another guy for taking too long to get off the bus. I closed my eyes, taking in the auditory delights of metropolitan transportation.

I soon arrived at my destination, the Paley Center for Media. Several weeks ago I bought a ticket to see the Late Night writers give a public Q&A and the day had finally arrived. You read that correctly - I paid money to see people on a Saturday that I see at work every day for free.

I was pleasantly suprised to find that the event was moderated by Sarah Vowell. I’m a huge fan of her writing and her radio work, and she brought her hilariously morbid personality with her. They opened the event by showing clips of great comedic moments from the past fifteen years of the show, every single one inciting a riotous laugh. Sarah’s first question: “I know we just watched that great highlight reel, but for my first question, I’d like you all to share your greatest failures.”

Responded one writer: “You mean as a father?”